We Need a Change Order: An Open Letter to Chip and Joanna Gaines

Dear Chip and Joanna,

I have been thankful for you and your family for years now. When it felt like America was sliding into the moral swamp, you presented a fun vision of a Christian family in the home renovation world. In entertainment terms, you have created a remarkable blend of humor, authenticity, and craftsmanship. You are loved around the world, and for good reason.

Many of us have marveled at all that you have created and built in Waco, Texas. This includes a ton of Christian families. We’ve prayed for you, cheered for you, and visited your famous complex in Waco. We’ve supported you amidst different trials you’ve faced publicly, and we’ve been thankful to our great God that you did not compromise on your shows by featuring visions of the family owing to paganism, not Scripture.

Which is why the new show on Magnolia Network called “Back to the Frontier” has troubled many of us. “Back to the Frontier” features a gay couple among the three featured “families” going back to the land. This couple could not have children in natural terms, of course, so they bought their children through surrogacy, a wholly unnatural form of family-creation. (By the way, Katy Faust is a faithful evangelical voice on surrogacy—check out this content and website.)

Just as “Fixer Upper” celebrated the God-designed natural family, so “Back to the Frontier” sadly platforms the unnatural “family.” The gay couple in question, Jason Hanna and Joe Riggs, said as much in a recent interview: “It was this great amazing opportunity to normalize same-sex couples and same-sex families.” This is the opposite effect that “Fixer Upper” has had over the years, and commendably so.

Chip, you seem like a fun and affable man. As a fellow father, I love that you are full of life. You’re joyful. You love your wife and children. You enjoy time with them. You work hard. You’re extremely skilled in your work, which is cool to see in a lazy age. You and your wife both model excellence in your craft, which stands out in our lazy, low-skill, low-ambition age.

In addition, I’ve watched you handle the dreaded “change order” more times than I can count—shifting structures, rebuilding walls, changing light fixtures, and other such last-minute tweaks. You regularly roll with these requests, doing so calmly, graciously, and with good cheer. You do so, in part, because the finished product is often all the better. Things looked great before, but your gifted wife’s sharp-eyed changes look all the better as you two improve what was already strong.

With regard to “Back to the Frontier,” I believe—in the simplest terms—that we need a change order. For what little it’s worth, here is my humble encouragement: consider pulling “Back to the Frontier.” I don’t say this in anger. I don’t say it to threaten you with the loss of money from the “family-friendly” crowd. I don’t say it from the peaks of Moral Mount Olympus.

No, I write this as a fellow sinner redeemed by the grace of God in Christ. As Christians, we cannot play any part as believers in normalizing sin. We know that sin is not freedom, but death. We know that there are not many ways to God, but one, and his name is Jesus Christ. We know that what our culture yells at us to affirm—namely sin of every kind, including sexual sin—only leads to eternal destruction (Revelation 21:8).

In saying this, I should note that you were right in your recent X statements to call for love among believers. No doubt convictional Christians can sometimes speak without love, me included. Further, “gentleness and respect” are non-negotiable in disagreement, you’re right (1 Peter 3:15). I’m sure you’ve felt the sting of ungentle speech many times as a public figure; I have real compassion for that.

But we’ve got to think hard about how Scripture handles love in a fallen world. You know this passage, but it bears restating:

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth (1 Corinthians 13:4-6).

Love, Paul says, “rejoices with the truth.” Should we love unbelievers of all kinds, showing kindness to them as much as we can? Yes. Does this include gay couples? Absolutely. But can we love them in a way that affirms their sin? We dare not. Doing so is not loving because of Scripture’s clear witness on the sinfulness of homosexual desire, identity, and action per texts like Romans 1:18-32 (here is one short resource on this controversial subject).

In an evil age, we need to celebrate what God celebrates. God brought Eve to Adam as portrayed in Genesis 2, founding the family by their marriage. Everything is built upon this. The natural family alone—one man married to one woman for life, with children coming from this union—honors God.

Not only this, but marriage is a living picture of the gospel. Christ has taken a bride for himself, the church, giving his own blood for our salvation (Ephesians 5:22-33). So we see that complementarian marriage is not only honoring to God on earth, but points us ahead, to the end of all things, the undoing of all evil and the wiping away of every tear (Revelation 22).

In noting all this, Chip, I am not condemning you and your wife as the only professing believers to ever err. Every Christian fails, me very much included. Every Christian stumbles (James 3:2). You and Joanna have no doubt weathered a great deal; you have taken a lot of heat, and I genuinely empathize with you. But compassion, we remember, isn’t compromise, just as love is not affirmation.

My prayer in writing this humble little piece is that you will consider these words. In truth, we all must hit the “Restart” button at different points in our lives. As Christians, it’s not just that we try to adapt a little in such instances, honing our conversational habits and improving our table manners. No, there’s something much bigger going on: it’s the refining work of our holy God.

We break stuff, but God rebuilds us—often through the experience of pain (Hebrews 12:3-13). Even as God disciplines and redirects us, however, Scripture teaches us that he is not a severe heavenly Father. He is patient, kind, and loving beyond comprehension. God is not only willing to forgive us when we break stuff; God loves to forgive us (Jeremiah 31:3).

You could put it this way: like you, Chip, God does a lot of demo. But this is loving demo—demo that changes us for his glory and our good. With that in mind, please know that I’m praying for you and Joanna, Chip. I’m cheering for you. In faith in our great God, I believe that this is not the last page of the last chapter of the book.

To put it differently: it’s a great day for a change order.

Best,

Owen Strachan

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Image: Magnolia Network/Discovery, Inc